Nov 30

Imaginary Questions.

Last day of NaBloPoMo!

Imaginary Questions : Somewhat embarrassing OR petty questions that people (esp those I know) wanted to ask me.

---

*Question
Answer

‘Should I’ Qs
Should I use my full name in Twitter?
Friends and people who know me can find me easily on Twitter if I use my full name. But that can include lecturers and potential employers too. I may have tweet too many things that are “not safe for work” (NSFW). I want to have the freedom to tweet whatever I want.

Will consider this again later.

Should I read Twilight and the rest of the series?
Sometimes when it comes to reading books… I tend to avoid the popular/bestseller ones (eg Harry Potter series, Da Vinci Code). But what made me attracted to Twilight (book, not the movies) was this post I read last year from Brontëana :

Meyer says it was only when she finished Twilight that she realised there were similarities with Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. And that Edward Cullen was a combination of her favourite romantic protagonists, especially Jane Eyre's Edward Rochester, because the two Edwards see themselves as “monsters''.

Pride and Prejudice. Edward Rochester. Oh~ *swoons* I love Mr Rochester.

But recently, I found this : “Twilight and Abusive Relationships” [Link], which led me to “What do you see in him again?” [Link].

I can see how easily I can become a fan of the books but I don’t like this mention of ‘abusive relationships’. Read or not?

Random Qs
Why do you not include your personal photos in your blog? Your photo on Twitter is too small, is that really you?
I choose privacy!

Actually, because I love tweeting so much I made it an exception on Twitter (so it’s really me!). I want other people to see ‘me’ on Twitter. The size is adequately enough to see my face, no need for a high quality version.

What about the photos in this post?
Oh, that. That was from over 10 years ago! No one will recognise me!

Why are you not on facebook?
I tend to avoid things that are popular.

Then what’s the deal with Jonas Brothers and Twitter? They’re popular too!
I guess when I decide which is popular and need to be avoided, I also have an exception list to consider. Those on the list are the things that stole my heart before I even have time to put them in my avoid list. Lol. I love JB’s music. Twitter isn’t that popular in Malaysia when I joined it few months ago (at least among people I know). I want to be one of those early person (among my acquaintances) to be on Twitter.

~~*to be continued…~~

There's an updated version of this in 2021...

Time: 2009-11-30T21:15:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo

Nov 29

5 Flavours Inside a Memory Box.

No mood to blog today so I took some really, really, really random things from my memory box. Actually the box used to be a shoe box, nothing special. But the things in it are priceless. There are sweet, sour, bitter, spicy and neutral things inside.

#1 “A Spicy Note” – I received this note after an individual science presentation when I was in Form 1 (2001). If you understand Malay, you can feel the spice in her message. I was amused that I could get a note like that (& also the fact she dared sending me that) at that time. It’s a thing from the past so I don’t think she remembers writing a note like that to me (thus I don’t mind displaying it here).

#2 “A Bitter Rejection Card” – Do you know why it’s bitter? I rejected the offer without consulting my parents. Ungrateful. My dad was really mad. They were even worried if I will reject this year’s offer & warned me beforehand to talk with them if I received any offer this year (which I accepted).

#3 “A Sweet Invitation Card” – That’s not me, it’s for my mum’s convocation. I have a post dedicated for that. I still think calling her “Mum” is more important than “Dr”.

#4 “A Sour Collection of Definitions” – Moral Education stuff. I memorised the highlighted words because they were keywords for definition questions and also for the essay part. I still hate that subject.

#5 “Neutral Reminders” – This was my ‘homework notebook’ in Form 3 (2003). Simple. I think I’m going to buy a similar notebook for next semester.

Initially, I thought of posting these photos only… I suddenly had the idea of describing the 5 flavours for these photos when I was typing the post. Inspiration is very unexpected & random. (Neutral isn’t really a flavour, is it? Tawar?)

Time: 2009-11-29T22:51:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , 5 Flavours , blog images , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Form 6 , NaBloPoMo , Personal Photos , Personal Thoughts , School

Nov 28

Keeping a Diary.

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | Me. | NaBloPoMo | Personal Thoughts

I started keeping a diary since 1998. I was 10 years old.

At that time, I used the organizer book given (or bought? I don’t know) by AIA as my diary (now I prefer thick, without-dates journal). I didn’t always fill it in, not everyday. Mostly I wrote about the chinese serial dramas I was watching on TV. It was kind of a collection of short reviews (on dramas)… With my opinions on certain scenes. Looking back at it now, I can hardly call it a diary but there you have it. I did write about things that made me mad which usually involved my family members and sometimes friends at school, but only a few…

I became serious at writing my diary two years later. I don’t remember when it started. The entries were mostly negative things (I still wrote about serial dramas on TV)… I thought of it as a way to ‘put down’ those frustrations and annoyance at school somewhere. It didn’t help to dispel my anger but it sure was a relief to let it out. I also started writing those entries in English. Broken English at first… haha. Wrong choice of words and wrong tenses, all that problems but I kept writing in English. I think it did helped improved my English essays, or if not… at least the experience gave me more confidence to write English essays.

At some point, I didn’t care if someone read my diaries… I mean, it’s personal… but sometimes I wished someone read it so that they’ll understand me better. I do worry though, if the people mentioned in it read it. ;P

Hmm.. Maybe that’s why started blogging. But I don’t blog the way I write into my diary. I am very, very biased in my diary. I don’t exactly have to be right but anybody else can’t defy me. It’s like that. I only want the Diary to ‘listen’.

I didn’t stick to it faithfully… I even skipped some years, which is too bad in my opinion. Bad because I won’t have the “complete” edition when I lose my memory. Lol. One weird reason why I insist on keeping a diary is to assist me when I unexpectedly have amnesia (I thought of this BEFORE watching “Samantha Who?”) due to yet-to-be-known accidents in the future. Not that I’m asking for an amnesia (or want it…).. duh. Nothing wrong with getting ready, right? Anyway, if it does happen… I thought my past diaries will help me remember or help me “get to know” myself again.

Since I started studying in university, I seldom write into my diary anymore. Recalling the “memory loss” reason now, I think I really should get back to daily diary writing.

Time: 2009-11-28T14:46:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Me. , NaBloPoMo , Personal Thoughts

Nov 27

NaBloPoMo so far...

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | Life | NaBloPoMo

3 more posts(days) left till November ends. That means the NaBloPoMo run for November is going to end too.

I'm having so much fun blogging... (I'm not sure if those who read my month-long posts are having fun too... haha). It gives me something to look forward to do everyday. There were days I had no ideas what to blog about but I made it through anyway. *hint*

Some things I noticed from my "blogging everyday" adventure :
-- more typing errors
-- weirdly-structured sentences.

*sigh* I'm not planning to do NaBloPoMo for December though...

Maybe I'll do more blog-surfing (reading other people's blogs) and commenting next month.

Time: 2009-11-27T19:49:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Life , NaBloPoMo

Nov 26

A boring 2005 post.

Boring, boring things ahead.

Okay. There isn't much I can blog about this week... Haha. So I'm going re-read & re-post some of my posts from 2005.

Before that, let me enlighten you to a bit history of this blog.

My first blog was at http://〇〇.blogspot.com/ and I used the readily available blogger template. Simple and light-coloured. [Full URL removed]

Then...moved to http://fight-oh.blogspot.com/(current) but the second look was this. I love the blue flowery look. I was still sticking to simplicity for the design.

And earlier this year, in February, I started using this layout. It wasn't easy to edit it according to what I want but it was worth it.

My first post.

why I decided to create my own blog site---to throw in all my thoughts which nobody wants to hear.

In the future, I'll be posting a lot about what I think and feel (either in English or Malay, etc)...yeah..maybe I'll also talk about Alec Su...he's my favourite chinese actor/singer since year 2000...& now I'm stuck with his Yang Si Lang....

I'm a fan of Alec Su since Primary 6. Now I'm still a fan but more of a closet kind of fan. Haha. Oh, yeah. I never blog in Malay anymore. I do put a bit malay phrases here in certain posts but not a full post since this one. My only post in Malay was about my secondary school's Sport Day.

My descriptions were very brief. I couldn't recall what happened that day when I re-read this post.

Tahun ini, Hari Sukan Sekolah diadakan pada hari Jumaat---biasanya hari Sabtu...percuma dengan hari cuti pada hari Isnin minggu berikutnya....kali ini tiada cuti.....

Rumah sukan Uranus menang besar kali ini...rumah sukan saya, iaitu Zuhal, no. 3 tahun ini...naik satu tangga..sekurang-kurangnya bukan tempat terakhir seperti tahun-tahun yang lalu~
PBSM menang lagi perbarisan unit beruniform yang terbaik---alah, macam biasa

A post in March 2005 inspired me to use "Fighting for Life" as my current blog title. The title of the post is "FiGhTiNg fOr My OwN fUtUrE".

I don't understand what is wrong with me! I have everything readied to assist my study and revision but it just seems that...

It's like...imagine...I have a good car with the most excellent engine...designed beautifully... fully-equipped...Other people's (my other classmates) car can't be compared to mine... YET, having all those is not enough if you never started your engine...Maybe I don't how to start OR I'm too lazy to bother about it cause it is a very tiring ...Other people has started their engines earlier than me & is winning...& ME, still resting under a tree by a lake with the car parked besides me...*SIGH*

I'm going to start the engine very soon...It's time to FIGHT FOR THE FUTURE!!!!!!It's time for revenge!!!

Seriously. What was that revenge for? Budak-budak betul. I think this was about the stupid meaningless competition (in class) I was talking about earlier. Can you sense the arrogance in that post?

I just realised I do like to sit in the front from this post..

I sit at front (first row) because I love it there. It is easier to ask questions and hear what teacher wants us to do...in fact, there are many students at the back who just can't stop talking especially when there is no teacher around. They are very *NOISY* ---I'll do anything as long as I'm far from them!

Once, I was late for Math class at the university... so I had to sit at the back. I was so annoyed by some of my coursemates behind me. They were talking so loud while the lecturer was (well..) lecturing. I don't mind loud music once in a while, but places where I expected silence (like lecture hall & church), I would be annoyed by people who make noises (& play loud music).

I have so many unlabeled "at-random" posts back then. I was blogging about school and then the next paragraph would be about Alec Su. Lol. Teenagers.

& BI... I was rushing to finish the 'directed writing' section...For 'continuous writing' I chose to write about how I prepare for major examination which ended up almost like my diary entry....
Quite funny, actually... the way I write looks like as I am blaming the school for my problems...

Lol. Actually I wrote the essay just like the way I blog now when I'm not satisfied about something. Funnily, I was one of the two students who got high marks for that paper. The other person was Vincent. The sad thing was, when the teacher talked about this, she forgot the name of the other person. The not-Vincent person. Haha. I kept quiet though when she asked him/her to come forward.

Oh, yeah. Did you know I caught chicken pox while in Form 5?... Glad it wasn't during SPM... but I sure had fun holidaying while I was sick.

Aug 7

hmmmm........still have fever & headache since yesterday....

I think I got chicken pox....(like my brother)....

weeks of staying at home...looking from the bright side--I'll have more time to surf the net & DL things~~

Confirmed it was chicken pox the next day.

...& thought a lot during sick. It was a long post... here's a teaser.

Anyway, the word 'friend' does not meant a lot to me anymore like before... I had experienced betrayal & loneliness... When you have friends, that doesn't mean you can't feel lonely... I do...

I had a change of mind after a few years I posted that. That was too dark and depressing (obviously it was posted when I was feeling depressed). I'm always trying to be honest (in telling about feelings) to my best friends now, even during happy or sad situations. Even if you're busy or far away from each other, you can maintain the friendship as long as you keep in touch constantly.

*This suddenly triggers a thought. Use my real name on Twitter?*

Wow. 2005 posts were hard to read.
Getting back to those gloomy posts gave me the glum of the day.

Moving on.

Time: 2009-11-26T14:21:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , blog images , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Life , NaBloPoMo , Reminiscences , School , Yearly Digest Post

Nov 25

Wants and Do's

It's easy to say that you want something or want to do something in the future. To do it is almost impossible... at least in my case, it is. *sigh*

Semester 2 will commence a month later. I have to keep reminding myself that it's not far away. It's happening. Doesn't matter if I'm ready for it or not, the second semester is coming. It was so easy to think that to make up for the laziness in Semester 1, I want to use this semester break to prepare for Semester 2. Yes. Easy. But I realise later on there's a loophole in my resolution.

I don't know where to start.

This is a very uncomfortable feeling. It's holding me back.

If you've been reading my previous posts (especially those during exam), you know I have worries for some of the courses I'd taken for Semester 1. I'm afraid if I there's need to repeat certain courses because I know I didn't do well for the exam. Then, should I start from there? Return to those courses? Re-study, review, revise? What the heck. When you reach the next semester, the previous semester is a thing of past, why should you look back?

So should I straight away start with Semester 2's courses? By studying beforehand the courses I'm taking for Semester 2, I wouldn't feel too overwhelmed when there's too much to read and write. But what if some of the courses require knowledge I should have learnt/studied from Semester 1? That's why I said I don't know where to start. There's things to think of and consider.

For now, I'm relying on my instinct and curiosity. Which topic that first come up in my mind, I'll study/learn about that first. When there's prerequisite stuff I need to know then only I'll take out the related reference books and notes again.

I think that's better than not doing anything, right?
*Baby steps, Ruth. Baby steps.*

I want to be best friends with Curiosity. I have always denied his ideas but now I don't see why I should continue doing that. He gives somewhat good, interesting ideas. I'm keen to try them now to see if they work for me. All I need are courage and discipline to execute his ideas.

Time: 2009-11-25T13:42:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Me. , NaBloPoMo , Self-talk

Nov 24

I use Google Reader.

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | Interest | NaBloPoMo

Do you use Google Reader?

I just started using it last year. At first I was just experimenting with other google services I can use other than gmail. Then I discovered how useful Google Reader is.

Some people 'socializes' within Google Reader (giving comments, "like" feature) but I think what's important is the "reading" part. To be able to share information with others is a bonus.

I do think there's room for improvement for other features... but for now, it serves its job well for me - Deliver updates without me visiting the web sites (except for commenting purposes or read the full article). It works very fine for me.

I have a list of blogs of people I know (schoolmates, church members, university mates...) in my google reader. Stalking? Not really. I'm just interested with their latest happenings. And they can choose to make their blog private. Duh. Speaking of blogs... another reason why I prefer "viewing" blogs in google reader is I want to avoid that background songs in their blogs. Oh yeah. & the small font they used. & the not-so-nice, distractive colours they used.

I also found out... how useful it can be when I want to know more about something (& want to be familiarised with it). For example, Twitter. When I started tweeting, I want to read any news & articles related to Twitter but I can't stand having to visit all sites just to read them. So I made a folder specially for that.. & put all related subscriptions under that folder. By doing so, I am constantly updated by the latest happenings regarding Twitter.

Just recently, I realised how Google Reader can help my university studies. I'm still getting used to what my course can offer so I don't know yet what should I subscribe to. I already have a "Maths" folder. Hehe... It's useful for work too, if you're not studying.

Time: 2009-11-24T23:48:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Interest , NaBloPoMo

Nov 23

Nov 23rd at random

This might be the shortest “at random” post ever made…

Two things that made my day today…

Google wave invite! (Time to learn waving!)

Jonas : Rockin' The House DVD (Volume 1). Just received it via mail today. YesAsia rocks. Lol.

===

I almost stop “blogging everyday" last weekend. I received a rejection letter from PTPTN (personal information inconsistency) . I was upset, which somewhat surprised me. What’s next? Re-apply PTPTN? Why am I having doubts? During my last months of Semester 1, I’ve been hearing (and reading on the internet) that I should avoid PTPTN if possible. They said the interest is high and their service (dunno which service they’re referring to) is crap. Twice they came to my university to collect the documents needed and twice I didn’t send my documents. Was that a sign for me to not make a deal with PTPTN? Bad omens? I personally HATE them. I hate the whole process. I hate the people who came to collect the documents. I came on the last day (Sunday), he said I ‘crossed’ the setem hasil (duty stamp)wrongly so I need to buy a new one. Do I have some spare? (I never heard about about setem hasil until the day PTPTN required me to use them. So I was like “Why the heck do you think I use setem hasil everyday?”). Can you get it today? (Yeah, right… as if the post office opens on Sundays.)

Prejudice? Yes, I guess. There’s just something devilish about this PTPTN thing that makes me uncomfortable. I wish my parents will understand and let me apply for something else.

===

That’s all!

Time: 2009-11-23T23:46:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Angry , at random , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , Shopping Bag , University

Nov 22

Behind the Story

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | NaBloPoMo | University

My sister was googling about Labuan Matriculation College & she read on a forum site where someone asked if Labuan has an airport?

Which brought the reason why I made this post. I didn't feel so good about my university orientation, but that doesn't mean nothing funny or amusing happened that week.

One of the nights... Yeah. We had activities till like 12++am, the university bus drivers worked overtime, and it took at least an hour to send 4000++ students back to their dorm. I was glad that during that week, it didn't rain heavily in the middle of the night. Anyway. The buses were totally loaded with people - overloaded - they want to send back as many students as they can in one trip. There was this one night, I was lost in my own thoughts... thinking this whole orientation thing was too overwhelming and I felt like being in a prison. The same time I thought of this, the song playing on the radio went "Penjara. Hidup ini penjara. [Jail. This life is a jail. -Sounded so weird after translated...-]" Lol. I was amused for a while. What a coincidence!

Then... there's one Q&A session (I don't remember what activity) but there were seniors present. They told us something about parents calling the university and asking whether buckets/pails are sold in Sabah. Huh. Another matter brought up was about stray dogs. Yes. We have dogs lurking around the campus, mostly near the in-campus dorms. A few female students complained about having those dogs erm... "stealing" their undergarments (the dog(s) dragged clothes on the cloth lines). There was also a case where a student found a dog lying in her bed. Her chief complaint was about her room's broken lock which enabled the dog to enter the room.

Time: 2009-11-22T22:36:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , University

Nov 21

Quotes and Definitions

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | Me. | NaBloPoMo | Personal Thoughts

Here are some quotes I found from books, TV shows & songs that remind me of myself.
Only four for now….

Sense and Sensibility, Chapter 23 (Jane Austen)

She was stronger alone, and her own good sense so well supported her, that her firmness was as unshaken, her appearance of cheerfulness as invariable, as, with regrets so poignant and so fresh, it was possible for them to be.

During my black years (f4,f5), I always thought the same like Elinor. I thought I can deal with the stress of SPM alone. Besides, I believed no one can help me because it's such a small matter (I can imagine them saying, "Everyone has it..."). But I was wrong.

Pride and Prejudice, Chapter 36 (Jane Austen)

"How despicably have I acted!" she cried. "I, who have prided myself on my own discernment! I, who have valued myself on my abilities! who have often disdained the generous candour of my sister, and gratified my vanity in useless or blamable distrust. How humiliating is this discovery!..." - Elizabeth

My reaction towards myself when I discover how flawed my own character (in form 6 till recently) were just like Elizabeth's. Although I wasn't dealing with love matters, to know that I'm wrong and gets wronger and wronger day by day was a horrible feeling. I'm so ashamed of myself that I don't know how to make amends to the blemishes in my way of thinking. Now, I'm taking baby steps to re-build my character and improve my mind.

House M.D. (Season 2, Episode 11)

“You don't like yourself. But you do admire yourself. It's all you've got, so you cling to it. You're so afraid if you change, you'll lose what makes you special.” – Dr Wilson

Wilson added “Being miserable doesn't make you better than anybody else, House. It just makes you miserable.” after that. I was thinking recently… being happy can make me miserable too. (This is un-related to the after quote). Because happiness is not permanent and it’s a “luxury”/expensive to get. *smiles meekly* I don’t know since when I seem so unsure of happiness… I know it happens but it’s not something you should expect to happen for the rest of your life. That’s what I think, for now. Happiness is like some kind of accident or on-the-spot occurrence and not a way of life. (Just a thought. Might change my mind later)

“Believe in Me” song by Demi Lovato
(Listen?)

I'm losing myself,
Trying to compete,
With everyone else,
Instead of just being me. Don't know where to turn,
I've been stuck in this routine,
I need to change my ways,
Instead of always being weak.

…….
It's amazing what you can hide,
Just by putting on a smile.

I love listening to her songs since last year. Some of the lyrics of her songs described the “me” in the past. Particularly this song. While there’s two parts to the song (I didn’t get to do that “Now I believe in me” part), the beginning was enough to describe my SPM years. The teachers said the competitions were high in my class - I only realised it was a meaningless competition after SPM. – I mean… what competition? To get No. 1 in class? To get the biggest amount of A’s in SPM? Then what? How could someone else getting straight A’s affect my life? Yeah, okay, it can happen in some way (less chance to win scholarship etc)… but when you see how much life can offer you (other fields, interests, areas, skills etc), it suddenly doesn’t matter that much (as before).

A smile doesn’t always mean that the person is feeling fine or having a nice day. It’s quite easy to smile when you’re in trouble and don’t want other people to know.

It still surprises me how I sometimes managed to do that.

Time: 2009-11-21T23:21:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Me. , NaBloPoMo , Personal Thoughts

Nov 20

Six or Seven?

Posted in: 2009 posts | Courses | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | NaBloPoMo | University

Okay, so last Monday I blogged about this…

I just knew that I missed my course registration again.
No japanese language class for me next semester and so on.
>_<

I’m done with the online course registration… but I don’t think it’s final yet. (What if I need to repeat some of the courses in Semester 1?)

Without counting any possible courses that need erm… repeating, I have seven courses (subjects?) to be taken in Semester 2. I kind of love my timetable the whole semester. Yeah, sure I will be having classes whole day in Monday but I don’t have Saturday classes (co-curriculum) anymore. I have 2 class-free days, excluding weekends. Okay, okay… I know it won’t last long but let me enjoy this last moment of self-denial for few weeks before Semester 2. Beginning from Monday to Wednesday, my classes “decrease”. Lol. I mean… I have 3-4 classes in Monday, then 2 classes in Tuesday and only one class in Wednesday. Brilliant, isn’t it? I purposely chose classes that are the same day (different time) with my school/faculty-related courses (which has rigid timetable).

What’s six or seven? That’s obviously the amount of courses I’m taking… I have two classes that clash with each other. Same day, same time. I think I’m going to take the other course next semester (3). I’m still hoping that the timetable is wrong….

Oh, yeah. I chose Russian language for my (compulsory) language course… A very new language to me. Other compulsory courses : “Ethnic Relations” & “Language and Communication” (chosen out of 4/5 choices). At school/faculty level : Only one Math-related course : “Mathematics II”, two minor-related (CG) courses “Structure Data” (Introduction) & “Object Oriented Programming” & “Statistical Package Programming”. The last one and “Math II” are the ones who have clashing timetables, & I plan to NOT take “Statistical Package Programming” if the timetable remains the same.

I will use this semester break to prepare (myself) for the worst in Semester 2.

Time: 2009-11-20T23:25:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , University

Nov 19

I was 12 once…

Before "I turned 21" this year, I was 12 once…

After some hush-hush conversations happening behind the place I sat in class, I realised my Primary 6 classmates were doing this… Writing birthday wishes and messages for me. Everything was put inside that jar-bottle thing.

It was one of my memorable birthday gifts. I thought it was really sweet. I get to keep all the ‘tiny memories’ they made for me.

& then there’s one random note, which is true!

I was lucky to know them!

Some birthday wishes included the “5A in UPSR” messages. (This is not the full collection.)

So. Apart from the usual “Happy Birthday” wishes, I had quite a few wishing (telling) me to smile always. I’m afraid that’s so true – I seldom smile… Or maybe it’s more like (I do smile) but my reactions to everything is so apparent on my face that you can easily tell if I’m pissed of by someone. Hmmm.

I didn’t smile much when I was little too which is evident from these photos…

If you’re wandering what’s that yellow thing I was wearing, it’s a plastic bag. If I remember correctly, I had thought that it looked cool to wear one (& my cousin and I were role-playing, I think it was supposed to be a costume.)

Okay, last one… the weird ones.
Joel’s message wasn’t ‘original’. I suspect he’s writing the monkey-kangaroo-zoo birthday song. Dianne wrote me a “Happy New Year” message (that’s 3 months away!).

Can you guess which birthday wish is my favourite?
(Favourite as in I-can’t-believe-that-person-wrote-that! & no it’s not E.E.’s)
=P

Time: 2009-11-19T17:57:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Birthday , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Me. , NaBloPoMo , Random-ness , School

Nov 18

Exam S1 : Final Week

~Computer Programming & Simulation, Digital Systems (7th Day); Economic Statistics (8th Day)

“I’m doomed.”

//The Courses/ /
(1) Computer Programing & Simulation – The lectures were quite a challenge to follow. Just like most courses with many students and… ‘bad’ microphones. I love the lab classes because that’s the only time where we can ask the lecturer personally about programming-related problems. This is the only group assignment that I was okay with. Kind of.

Initially I planned that I’ll do the program, and the other two will do the paperwork… then I had problems with the program & also because everyone was busy with other assignments, one of my group members suggested that we erm… ‘re-use’ a senior’s (from other school/faculty) program. I was okay with it at first but you know when something you do is associated with the phrase “Everyone’s doing it”, you know it’s not always a good thing.

Last minute, I realize what I did wrong and revived our program. I was relieved that my group members were okay with starting from scratch (she was near to sending the “re-used” one). We spent almost a whole day at the library “Maybe you should try this code”, “I think we should say it this way…”, “What about this?” – I mean we really worked as team! (not really the best but close enough). It was a really simple program, but we did it together. That’s what matters most.. especially after I did my (individual) ethics assignment about “Plagiarism”.

(2) Digital Systems – This is my second favourite course. The lecturer was really direct and easy to understand. She made sure that we understood enough before going to the next chapter. I actually admire her from the first day we met her. I mean… isn’t it impressive to have a female lecturer who knows a lot about computers? She talked about games with the guys. I always have seen her as “Not just a pretty face” type. She’s really cool. I hope she’s going to teach us again next semester.

(3) Economic Statistics – We had two lecturers for this course. I like the second one better. Statistics isn’t really one of things I’m good at so I don’t have much to talk about the course.

//Exams//
Terrible, terrible, terrible! You can’t go out there in the war without knowing how to fight and without your weapons! Suicidal. Totally. I hate to think that I will have to repeat any of those courses... Arghh.

Time: 2009-11-18T23:34:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 17

Semester break…

Posted in: 2009 posts | About Blogging | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | University | University: Year 1

Cuti, cuti, CUTI!!!~

There’s just so many things I want to do! Catch up with old/overdue things. Do new things. Organizing & learning to organize better. All sorts of things that will make me feel better and also prepare me for next semester.

As if it’s gonna happen that perfectly. Huh.

I always have doubts about my ability to plan and follow my own plans.

Anyway….

Among the things/plans I have in mind…

Read lots of lots of books. 5-10 books per month.
Play Sims 3 + expansion.
More practice for piano.
Some housekeeping chores for my room.
Officially drive the car on the road [more often]..
Sleep, nap, siesta… rest! Once I feel rested, then only I can think clearly (for important matters).

And then… there’ s some university-related ones…

Organize/Create a timetable & personal study timetable for next semester.
Familiarise myself with what to expect next semester.
Find/Devise a way to study efficiently and more fun without all those boring, repetitive factors added in.
Master C Language. Or/And learn another programming language (java?).
Prepare myself mentally for challenges regarding group assignments and group members.
Prepare myself mentally and physically for erm… any unexpected circumstances. E.g Repeating a Semester 1 course.

Also…

Make blogging daily a habit (doesn’t need to join the NaBloPoMo blogroll every month). I’m hoping that as it becomes a part of my daily life, I wouldn’t take so long to compose a post. 30 min-1 hour a day would be great.
Be more careful with my choice of words on Twitter (Think before you tweet).
Organize a timetable for my other blogging projects.
Housekeep my blog posts.

Not interested in…

Working part time.
Going to the cinema. (I dislike dark places. Even if it’s a movie with YamaPi or Joe Jonas in it, you still can’t drag me there.)
Going to places with big crowds.

It’s not like I prefer staying at home during holidays… It’s just that I can always find things to do at home. I mean.. isn’t that what people’s main reason to go out, ‘cos they are bored at home? I go out almost every weekends too, so I’m not a person who’s afraid to go outdoors.

Easy to make plans, hard to execute them…

Time: 2009-11-17T23:43:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , About Blogging , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , University , University: Year 1

Nov 16

Got the Monday Blues.

Everything is blue today. Black. Grey. Not colourful.

I hate my procrastinating self more than ever.

I just knew that I missed my course registration again.
No japanese language class for me next semester and so on.
>_<

I totally screwed up my two papers today.
Dread to think that I might have to repeat those courses...

I hate being a procrastinator.

Time: 2009-11-16T22:37:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Life , Me. , No Mood , University , University: Year 1

Nov 15

More blogthings…

Posted in: 2009 posts | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | NaBloPoMo | online quiz | University: Year 1

What I got for...
(You can click the title of the quiz to try them yourself.)

How Do You Tell the Truth?

You Are Honest and Open

You are a very honest person, yet you somehow avoid being brutally honest with people.
You know that the truth often does hurt, so you try to cushion the blow as much as possible. And because of your approach, people do appreciate your honesty.

You're the type of person who complements before you criticize. You try to put the truth in perspective and make it seem not so dire.
And whenever you're stating your opinion, you make it clear that it's just that ... your point of view. You can only speak your own personal truth.

What Kind of Book Are You?

You Are Humor

You love to laugh at life, and if possible, get others to laugh along with you.
You believe there's always a humorous side to everything. And your sense of humor ranges from upbeat to very dark.

You are outrageous and very honest. You're often the only one willing to say what everyone else is thinking.
You are witty and verbally talented. You like to play with words and say things in interesting ways.

Are You Thin Skinned or Thick Skinned?

You Are Medium-Skinned

You can be sensitive at times, but that's totally normal.
Your sensitivity means you can be empathetic and compassionate, even if you're a bit thin-skinned.

You take what people think into account but you try not to let it get to you.
It's hard not to take things personally, but you do your best.

---This one is disturbing. Should I be worried?

Are You Bipolar?

You Are 84% Bipolar

You have some serious ups and downs, maybe to the point of endangering your own life.
Consult a doctor to see if you may truly have bipolar disorder.

What did you get? (you can skip the bipolar one)

Time: 2009-11-15T23:54:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , online quiz , University: Year 1

Nov 14

Exam S1 : 6th Day

~Dragon Boat

//The Course// Activities near the sea. *sigh* It was fun but I’m not a fan of water sports around people I barely know. Getting wet and all that – I’m uncomfortable with such situations. I think I even had some trust issues with my other coursemates. Yeah, I know I shouldn’t feel that way…

Hmm. But I did learnt something new so it wasn’t really a total loss. I actually dislike Saturday classes especially outdoor ones. Hopefully no more Saturday courses next semester (I’m okay with lab or tutorial classes ‘cos that one is indoor ;D).

//Exam// I didn’t study for this at all. The questions were surprisingly easy! But, I didn’t study or revise so I didn’t remember all the points… My loss. Duh.

As long as I passed, I’m happy.

Time: 2009-11-14T22:32:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 13

Already in Holiday Mood.

Oh. Gosh.

Next time, I must allocate more time for study in the beginning of the semester so that I can NOT study during exam week. I’m so hopeless during these times… can’t concentrate, can’t focus, easily distracted… I can always find something more fun than being a zombiefied student reviewing exam notes.

It’s terrifying to go into the exam hall totally unprepared. I know I should feel nervous, butterflies in my stomach, accelerated heartbeats – that kind of things – but I don’t really get those things anymore. Is is because I grew accustomed to "being scared” (during exam) in form 4/5 that I can’t “feel scared” properly anymore? Crazy thoughts. I mean, my brain tells me “I’m afraid” but I don’t seem to show those signs. Hmm..

Anyway. I have another paper tomorrow that I’m ready to kiss goodbye to good marks… Then next Monday, I have computer-related exam papers. I’m aiming for those. I want at least B-. My last paper is on Tuesday… Economic Statistics. Ah. That, I don’t know. I’m having a hard time trying to understand the concepts. It baffles me how I cannot understand something that’s supposed to be easy-to-grasp. Sometimes I suspect that I, myself, ‘refuse’ to understand… but that’s just another crazy thought.

Time: 2009-11-13T23:46:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 12

Exam S1 : 5th Day

~Mathematics I

Preparation & perspiration . And a Joe distraction.

After 2.5 hours…
“It’s over~ It’s over~”

3 more hard papers next week…

“I love Maths! *lame!*”

//The Course// Maths I is my favourite course. Naturally. It’s the only course where even though I didn’t pay full attention (sleepy) I still can get it. Actually, it’s Pure Maths again with some advanced stuff. I like the lecturer too, she’s direct and her lectures were easy to understand. Unfortunately, I seldom do my revision and math exercise…

//Exam// It wasn’t bad but it’s not smooth-sailing either. I panicked when I could only remember half of a formula… Anyway. I missed one question because not enough time (but I didn’t know how to answer anyway. haha).

Time: 2009-11-12T23:13:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 11

Exam S1 : 4th Day

~Ethics for Professionals

Lazy… What? Can’t hand in early??

Trapped for 1 hour…

“Thank you for not noticing me. =)”

//The Course// I actually like this course… and I intend to continue studying it in the future. The lecturer emphasised two-way interactions and discussions in the class so he always lectured for like 30 mins only. The rest of class was a session of talking and hearing other people talking.

//Exam// The questions were quite easy. I said it’s easy because there were many questions with obvious answers. It could’ve been easier if I read all the lecturer’s notes. Oh, well… At least I think I got half of questions correct.

Because it was an hour paper (one can only hand in early after 30 min the exam started & cannot hand in 15 min before it ends), the lecturer won’t let us out early… =| That one-hour was like 2 hours…

Time: 2009-11-11T15:02:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 10

Exam S1 : 3rd Day

~Islam and Asian Civilization

“Oh, crap!”

//The Course//

Not gonna lie… the lecturer was more boring than the subject itself. I don’t know how the lecturer managed to read out from the powerpoint slides so monotonously every week! It was torturous. I kept fighting back my sleep. Then one day, I decided to listen to my MP3 player (with low volume) while the lecturer was lecturing in the front. Okay, I know that’s not the best practice while in class but… it did kept me awake & more focused till the end of the class. I heard there’s other lecturers who were more interesting in their teaching approach… Hmm. I didn’t bother switching course (lecturer) because the timetable was right for me. I didn’t want another night class.

//Exam// Bad. Terrible. (I don’t feel like talking about this.)

Goodbye, TITAS. Hopefully I won’t have to see you again.

Time: 2009-11-10T20:37:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 09

Exam S1 : 2nd Day

~Art Appreciation

“I don’t wanna study… Don’t wanna study…”

Tembak-tembak jawab… Whatever will be, will be…

Handed in early…

“Oh La La?”

//The Course// Art Appreciation… It was a fun course. I like the lecturer even though she started class three weeks late. She delivered ‘fast’ lectures. In our first class, she finished all three topics that should be covered earlier in 2 hours (or less. I don’t remember). Wow. Anyway. What I remember most for this course is the group presentations. Lots of them (the lecturer said our class had the most students compared to other “Art Appreciation” classes). I think half of the classes conducted were all presentations only. Some of the topics presented were interesting (How to take photo/photographing techniques) & nice (Hong Kong movies – horror, martial art, comedy…), mostly boring & too wordy (their powerpoint slides).

Then there’s that group performance. Yeah. It’s quite easy (the appreciating part) and fun (no wonder there’s so many 2nd year engineering students took this).

//Exam// It was an MCQ exam. The questions were okay. If I had read my notes (which of course I didn’t) carefully, I should have been able to answer it better than today. The lecture notes were not that easy to find… so I guess that’s why after 30 minutes or so, people started handing in their question papers and answer sheets. Wow. By the time I hand in mine, half of the hall was empty. Whether they were too smart to be able to answer in a short span of time or just clueless of what to answer, I don’t know…

Oh, well.
I have no expectations for good marks…

Time: 2009-11-09T14:14:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 08

A Day for Musical Thoughts.

If you think this post is about a song I/someone just wrote or an awesome clip I just saw on youtube…

It’s not.

Anyway. Despite a week crammed with final exam papers coming, I think I was in an oddly good mood this morning. It’s not like I do that every Sunday… but I hate being pestered around in the morning (“Are you ready yet?”). A total mood killer.

Today it was loud as usual at church (I blabbered before about the loud music) but I was enjoying it. Beautiful music. The guitarist was absent but everything sounded great… the music team (excluding the singers) had good chemistry with each other. Two of my cousins were on the stage, one playing the bass guitar & the other the electric piano. I admire them… I wish I was brave enough to perform on stage or at least in front of those children in Sunday school. I’m not that confident.

Then, after church, it’s piano class. We were an hour late. As I entered the music school, my piano teacher saw me and waved. So it seems I missed the dateline for registration of ABRSM Theory Exam. But I can still register today. The exam is in March next year, I don’t know what class I’ll miss on that day… but hopefully it’s not a mid-term exam day. The ABRSM practical exam I took this year was [so fortunately] on a day I didn’t have classes. Coincidence, but I was grateful I chose to let my Thursday free of classes. My mum suggested me taking the June/July’s Guild Theory Exam again (I took Guild’s Grade 1 before)… but I somewhat made my mind to take ABRSM exams only. No particular reason, really. Okay, maybe it has something to do with my teacher having faith (questionable, ‘cos I’m quite inconsistent in my progress) in me to take them… I don’t know. I believe she knows the best & I trust her decision.

I registered for the March exam anyway and now I have a new fear.

Regarding piano… I’m always afraid that I’m not good enough. I have all the reasons I can think of to prevent my self-confidence from soaring – not enough practice (which is true) and starting so late. The former is easy to change but the latter… it doesn’t always bother me (because I kind of believe I have something a child piano student don’t have), but it’s there. The thoughts come out occasionally… accompanied with my past regret of letting go the opportunity to learn music early. *sigh*

This evening, my cousin and her family came. They had other business to attend to with my father but I had a small pep talk with my cousin-in-law. I believe that’s the only time I ever had a conversation with him. Haha. He saw our piano and came the usual interrogation about when it was bought, about learning to play etc. He also played some songs on the piano. He was good! He said he didn’t learn it formally… aww… I always envy these kind of people. You know. People who can listen and arrange those songs on the piano almost immediately. Apparently I have many cousins who are like that and I wondered why I don’t have it. Huh. Anyway. I’m jealous enough to practise more in the future…which I think is a positive thing.

He told me that it wasn’t hard to play that way… I just have to listen to more music (piano version ones, I assume) or anything I like (“There’s nothing wrong with pop songs…”) and try playing it on the piano. When I have get used to it, it would come off naturally next time. Hehe. And he asked me to go and play the keyboard at their church in Alamesra (where there’s many students from the same university I go to.) While the idea of performing in front of a crowd is appealing but far-fetched at the same time, I do think he had given me advice that suit my current thoughts.

Am I too selfish to pursue my tertiary education at the same time with music? I don’t want to feel regret again for letting go the opportunity. Music is one of the reasons I live off-campus & miss all those dorm experience. People around me (mostly indirectly, through my parents) had often question my decision of not living in the university dorm. I think some people hate me for doing so. Sometimes I take it to heart of such suggestions (which I’ll appreciate if you don’t mention it in the comments section) but I know they were thinking the best for me. I can’t say I’m sure that my decision is the right one… but I won’t let it be the wrong one. Maybe what’s ‘right’ for others isn’t always ‘right’ for me.

Time: 2009-11-08T23:37:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Interest , Life , Me. , NaBloPoMo , Piano , Piano Exam , University , University: Year 1

Nov 07

Wordle Weekend

Playing around with wordle and TweetStats.

My Tweet Cloud (without @replies)

My Tweet Cloud

November’s Tweet Cloud

Time: 2009-11-07T11:46:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , Tweets , Twitter , University: Year 1

Nov 06

Quotes from here and there.

I subscribed to interesting blogs in my google reader, one of them is Jorge Garcia’s blog.

Yeah, I’m so random on reading other people’s blog. Haha.

On Nov 3rd, he posted about not being on facebook. I was amused by one of the comments he received (it’s Arwengreenleaf’s). She just gave a me another reason to stay away from facebook. =)

I have a friendster account since 2005, but I wasn’t participating much. I was only there out of curiosity. In short, I don’t really care. So, I’m not that excited to join facebook. I know it’s not the same but blogs and twitters are where I’m comfortable to socialize. Twitter is very personal to me (I didn’t even use my real photo for friendster). I tweet what I have in mind. Sometimes it gets too personal, I become a bit afraid if those people I mentioned will find out what I tweeted about them. I deleted those tweets later but most of them I just leave it there. I don’t use my full name though.

Well said, @Neylev!

My sentiments exactly.

"Around here, however, we don't look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things, because we're curious... and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths." – Walt Disney

These two are my exam quotes!

Then, there’s this @kennysia’s tweet that I favourited recently few weeks ago.

Also, what Kevin and Joe said of Nick’s side project (& they’re not breaking up) in their myspace blog… I thought it’s beautiful. ^_^

“A three chord strand is not easily broken”, and one thing’s for sure… this three chord strand is stronger now than it’s ever been.

Time: 2009-11-06T22:47:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , Personal Thoughts , Twitter , University: Year 1

Nov 05

Exam S1 : 1st Day

~English for Research Purposes.

The questions… The time left to finish… My expectations…

“Bye bye Grade A and Grade B…”

I would be content with a solid C. I don’t want to retake this course.

//The Course// It’s on Monday nights. Initially I was like oh-man-bleh-urghh when I realised I only have this class – no other suitable choice – left. I didn’t want to go to class on a day I get Monday Blues. But, I took it anyway because I want to take the foreign language class next semester. I do realise the course could help me later in my future project paper/term paper/dissertation/thesis on higher level – that’s why this was my second choice (1st choice : “Grammar in Context”.)

I still don’t know how many students were in my class, never bothered to count but we pretty much get along. Someone asked the lecturer something, we listened. Someone made a joke, we laughed. It’s that kind of class. I think we were the laziest class my lecturer had ever taught. She kind of implied it that way & I don’t blame her.

*sigh* What can you expect? I think everyone was always in Monday Blues mode during class. We were sleepy. We were tired. We couldn’t wait to get back and sleep like a log. Okay. Maybe some of them want to get back and study, I don’t know. I actually like the class because there’s only a few of us and it’s English language-related. I had always enjoyed English language lessons during my primary and secondary school days.

//Exam// This was one of few courses that I aimed to get A or A-. Or B+. But after taking the exam yesterday, all I want to say is “I want a C.” Oh, gosh. Oh, shoot. Oh, my. In the official time-table, it’s supposed to be a 3-hour paper but (alas!) they announced before the exam, it’s actually 2 hours!

The questions were hard!!! Challenging. Took some time to understand the journal article used in the question (I think it’s related to psychology field or sub-field….).

I panicked when I had less than an hour left. I didn’t finish question 2 yet. Question 3 was time-consuming like Q2. I didn’t bother reading the article (excerpt, not full text) again. Jumped to the real questions straight away. I wasn’t even sure if I read & answered them right.

C. C. I want a C.

Time: 2009-11-05T13:43:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exam Sem1 , Exams and Tests , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 05

Exam Month.

Because I’m having so much fun with my blogging project, I kind of forgot to mention about my exam and its ‘preparation’ for this exam month – November. Oh, boy. It’s going to be a challenge to blog everyday next week. I have exam all week… except Friday and Sunday.

I hate to think about it anymore. Inadequate preparation. Last-minute cramming. I don’t expect much for this first semester. Not that I don’t care but sometimes you have to let go and move on. Start anew next semester. Full stop.

Anyway. I’m going to blog about those exams and there’s 8 days in total. I’ll be posting about the courses I’d taken, my hopes (which mostly will be ‘no hopes’ – I’ll talk about it anyway ;D) and move on.

===
The quote that made me love “Meet the Robinsons”...
(I just recently managed to watch the movie on Disney channel)

"Around here, however, we don't look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things, because we're curious... and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths." – Walt Disney

===
Oh yeah. Good luck to those taking exam around this month too.

Time: 2009-11-05T13:27:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Exams and Tests , Life , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Nov 04

Bad Start to the Morning.

Posted in: 2009 posts | Angry | Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) | NaBloPoMo | University: Year 1

*this author was still in shock while this post was made*

These past two days, I’d been waking up too late (9-10 am) in the morning… which kind of ruined my mood to study/revise that day. So today I managed to wake up at 4am++…

…and after a (too early) morning shower, I went to the living room, switched on my laptop and connected to the internet. Gmail, Twitter & Google Reader. A quarter to 6am. Hoping to take a photo of sunrise outside my room (just experimenting, the view isn’t that spectacular), I returned to my room and found this outside my [recently renovated – messy] window.

The plastic bag wasn’t there last night.

It freaked me out as soon as I saw it.

Was there someone (stranger?) outside my window last night?

I even suspected my neighbour’s the culprit but…

There’s one outside my neighbour’s window too.

Whether he did it on purpose to make him look innocent or he wasn’t the one… I was totally disturbed by this incidence.

You said “What’s the big deal?”???

I asked someone else to throw it away (without bringing it inside my room) so I didn’t look inside.

So why it’s a big deal?

I suspected :

(1) Neighbour’s sick joke (they always throw cigarette butts outside my sister’s window and also our front yard). Honestly, I hate my neighbours. Both sides. They smoked a lot (everyday, even at 3 am!! Gila.) and they let the smoke came to our place all the time. I hate them even more when my parents don’t do anything and want us to forgive them. I hate the me that I turned into whenever I have to deal with the smoke so I can’t love such murderous neighbour. Ironically they are Christians. One being an SDA and the other RC.

(What’s that? “You can’t judge someone by their religion? You can’t expect them to be good by what religion they take?” )

(2) Bomoh/black (sickening) magic. I’m not superstitious. But I remember watching (or reading) something about people planting something gross in other people’s yard to like kenakan (I can’t find a better word. Voodoo them. Ill-wishing?) them. I don’t believe it actually works (it’s psychological) but I find these kind of things sick and gross – I don’t want that thing outside my room’s window. I don’t want that thing near the place I sleep.

(3) Crazy stranger. Random? Stalker? Wrong target? Or just a plain trash thrower who didn’t have anything better to do.

My family wasn’t happy with my reaction. Which annoys me ‘cos they say it’s only a plastic bag. Can’t they show more compassion on my nerves? This disturbing incident made me upset to tears.

Yeah, yeah…. laugh all you want at my overreaction. Maybe I’ll laugh too later when I’m old, when I’m bored being over-protected on my one and only life.

Seriously, it’s better to be safe then sorry.

I don’t like reading those nasty news (remember this?) – I don’t want those kind of things happening to me and people I care and love.

Yeah. Keep on laughing. I don’t care.

Time: 2009-11-04T08:33:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , Angry , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , University: Year 1

Nov 03

Nov 3rd at random

Have you watched BOO?
===

In yesterday’s post, I forgot to mention about the navbar (navigation bar –up there). Actually, I’ve always wanted to show the navbar but I can’t find a colour that suits this blog’s layout. Until last Friday. Blogger released two new colours for the navbar “Transparent Light” and “Transparent Dark” and I straight away edited my layout html. I had chosen “Transparent Dark”.

Yeah, I made it visible plainly because I want to be seen as a blogger/blogspot user… well, it’s also convenient ‘cos it got these useful links ‘Follow’ (to follow the blog you’re reading), ‘Share’ (to share what you’re reading now using e-mail, twitter, facebook and google reader) and ‘Report Abuse’. Hah. Not that I always blog about things that could cause someone click ‘Report Abuse’. But I remember reading somewhere saying that a blogger shouldn’t hide the navbar because the navbar gives access to readers to those links I just mentioned.

===
Random Photos… ‘Yesterday’.

The sky yesterday was like this before it rained…

Returned books at the state library (was fined RM6.30) and most of these new books I borrowed were randomly chosen.

If you don’t know what to read next, try selecting books randomly.

Though sometimes I end up not reading them.

*Lol. That was lame!*

Time: 2009-11-03T17:17:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , at random , blog , blog images , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , NaBloPoMo , University: Year 1

Nov 02

Of Blogging and Tweeting

Instead of choosing October or December, I chose November as my NaBloPoMo month. I’m totally new to this but there’s always first-times for anything! Hopefully, I’m doing it right. Why November? Hmm… It’s actually a part of my BoP plan which I’ll blog about later after I thought deeply of the matter. Anyway… I thought it’s a good way to get to know other bloggers around the world (I do read some of those on the blogroll). It’s also a way to bring more readers here… though I don’t really have much to offer other than the stories of my life and my opinions. But I love the NaBloPoMo site, it’s a really nice place for bloggers to get together and discuss about blogging. I haven’t participate much on the site though (commenting etc), but I plan to do so during my semester break.

Also, starting from this post, I’m using a new kind of commenting system. DISQUS. Other than being attracted to the comment form interface, I had always wanted a comment system that enable readers to use their Twitter account to comment.

Twitter and tweeting… I still do it daily and recently I dragged another friend of mine to tweet! She had a good start… though she was a few weeks late to follow Miley Cyrus. Oh yeah. That name reminded me of something I just read yesterday. Apparently a fan of hers (or several? I didn’t take time to read through the original site) threatened to eat her/his cat, Fuzzy, if Cyrus doesn’t return to Twitter. My first reaction was this. Nasty, nasty fan(s). And bad influence. Sorry, @Neylev if you’re reading this. I’m really not a fan of hers. If she brings such influence (animal cruelty?) to her fans then it’s better if she stay away from Twitter. Anyway. I’m more concerned of the cat actually and I don’t blame Cyrus entirely for this.. the fan(s) should’ve thought of better ways to reach out to her if they have brains to think.

Leaving that pathetic issue aside… What do you think of re-tweeting someone whose twitter account is private/protected? I do RT some of my friends when they tweeted something interesting and suits my current thoughts. But one of those cool tweets belong to a friend with a private account. Evan Williams (Twitter CEO)’s tweeted :

What if the protected tweets are about something very important that I think the world should also know about it?

Can I say that it depends on the protected twitter user? Maybe some of them are okay with re-tweeting some of their tweets as long as it’s NOT ALL of them.

*sigh* To the friend I’m talking about, if you think I shouldn’t RT certain tweets (or all of it… though you know that my fingers will itch to re-tweet that cool, funny or interesting tweets of yours ;-D ) tell me so and I’ll stop.

Time: 2009-11-02T17:57:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 2009 posts , About Blogging , blog , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Interest , NaBloPoMo , Personal Thoughts , Tweets , Twitter , University: Year 1

Nov 01

October Leftovers.

October was a really demanding month. Glad it’s November now!

I have all month to blog about my day(s)… Because I chose November ! (Ranting and being boring all November, oh yes!!)

I finished all my assignments/project papers but there’s two or three that I knew I could do better… but my procrastination self took over, and the results were barely so-so. I’m so ashamed of myself. >.<

Anyway… there’s 2 university-related things that happened in October that I should mention here.

First : My ERP presentation. Till this day, I could still laugh at what had happened. Oh, silly me. Last minute preparations (‘cos I was rushing last-minutely my ERP project paper… *ashamed*) for presentation! I’d done a draft for the script but only managed to have it finalized the day I was going to present. Crazy. Then during presentation, I totally used a new script!!! It’s not an improvisation whatsoever. A made-on-the-spot script because I couldn’t remember my script. I wasn’t mad at myself for ruining my presentation, I was more amused of what I just did. I thought I did well for Q & A session but I can’t be so sure of it. Awkwardly done. I couldn’t bring myself to think of what the lecturer thought of my presentation. Huh. But the experience still makes me laugh now so I guess I don’t really feel disastrous (yet?) about it.

Second : ‘Art Appreciation’ assignment – on-stage performance! Hah! My group (cos it’s last minute, again) decided to sing in which I did miserably at remembering the lyrics. Well. We had 3 songs performed. “Menjelang Detik”, “Sayang Sayang Kinabalu” & (last minute addition) “Gemuruh”. The 3rd song is never my favourite (Sorry… I’m really not a fan!). It’s obviously a general favourite in Malaysia… my group members didn’t have hard time singing that (I suspect that they listen to it everyday). If I wasn’t pressured by my last-minute-need-rushing other assignments, I could’ve enjoy this. It was the easiest assignment for this semester – all you have to do is SING!! And my group members were really fun to hang out with (can’t say the same about me though… I was mostly not-smiling during practice). Cool people.

The performance day was even better. Okay. Actually, I was in a bad mood all night ( I hadn’t eaten. I was sleepy. I wanna go home!) but I believe I enjoyed it secretly… Other groups that performed musical dramas were enjoyable. I saw some familiar faces from my MCG course (and also sister-course ME).

End of leftovers.

Time: 2009-11-01T23:46:00+08:00
Posted by RuYanda
Labels: 1st post , 2009 posts , Courses , Delayed Rebellious Phase (Cringeworthy) , Life , NaBloPoMo , University , University: Year 1

Fighting for Life

About Me

I'm predictably unpredictable, inconsistent, random & eccentric. Sometimes arrogant and silly. Always curious. Read that again without the snobbish tone.

「　Fighting For Life　」
Blogging since February 2005
RuYanda @ Ruth

My Other Sites

My Other Posts...

Fighting for Life

About Me

Blog Status

Search

Favourite Quotes

Things Currently in My Mind...

Personal

Archives

Label Cloud

Followers