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School: SPM Years
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Originally posted on Wednesday, August 31, 2005 in my old blog
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今天很倒霉。。。
Went to school had parents-teacher-student meeting ~ got a NOT SO GOOD results.
& Dad bugged me all night about what had happened to my results & went on blaming me spending so much time on computer..bla..bla..bla
I, myself don't even really understand what the problem is. A very bad result [yet, I tried harder than before for this first trial exam] ~ It took me some time to realise that whatever had happened was merely caused by my intentions to GET ATTENTION from teachers. I performed badly to get their attention & to gain their concerns. All in the hope of increasing my self-confidence & motivation.
Removed paragraph indicating my identity.
"Isn't its good to study not because of exams.... (but because we want to/interested to~)," my friend, Khairul said a few days ago.
I may be too young to know how the education system in Malaysia work but one thing I realised, we rely a lot on exams to show how good we are in academic achievements. People judge your intelligence by counting your A's (your exam results). Teachers favour you when you do exceptionally well in the subject he/she teaches(those who fail/didn't get good marks--teachers don't care about them anymore. Malaysian own exam-oriented education system may produce a lot (is it? I'm doubtful about it) people with tonnes of A's printed on a sheet of paper - but is it what we really want? what we really need?
These 'products' may graduate from universities with good results but are they balancedly developed? They may have highly-paid jobs (duh...some are too picky, they are still jobless till now) but do they really enjoy doing it? A life without fun is like a canvas painted by a bad painter - their paintings have no value. No originality. No creativity. Robotic students will eventually turn into monsters (because of stress - commit suicide). Everything is so fake & dull.
Each people have different types of learning ability. There may be no such thing as stupid people but fast-learners & late-learners exist...... Fast-learners have the biggest advantage yet most of them have the common learning disease - LAZY (like me..)...Ironically, the late-learners are DILIGENT because they know they have to work harder to compete with the fast-learners.
School makes me bored. I'm bored to death attending classes in school. I'm bored not because of the subject the teachers teach but BORED because in all the classes, the teachers TEND TO FOCUS MORE on teaching/telling us about 'HOW TO SCORE WELL IN SPM'. Why did the education ministry provide all the subjects in the first place????? No need to waste time translating books on Maths, Biology, Chemistry etc because all that doesn't matter. We don't learn about the subjects, we learn about memorising the right answer & right answering technique for SPM. The Ministry of Education might as well rename the subjects to HTS-
ALL this exam orientation create a situation where learning new things is no more fun anymore. No joy of getting our mind's curiousity fed by our own efforts. We are obliged to memorise the right technique to answer the exam questions. Don't care how much you understand, JUST MEMORISE IT, MEMORISE IT!!!!!! & you'll get good results in UPSR, PMR, SPM, STPM..... (also..
To the Malaysian Ministry of Education & all the teachers :
DID YOU KNOW HOW MUCH HAVE I SUFFER BECAUSE OF THIS? Did you know how much have I suffer just to adjust myself to suit the exam-oriented learning ways in school? I'm not trying to blame others for my bad results, BUT .....JUST THINK ABOUT IT!!! I have my own way of pursuing knowledge...
"You fail to be like others, but you'll never fail being your own self."~
I can't!!! I can't apply myself to the way learning/teaching is conducted in school, never it will be....
I don't intend to disappoint my parents. My dreams are theirs. It's just that I can't change myself just to become similar or equal to the formal way of learning.
[Off topic: Loneliness...has been a great companion of mine all this years. He's my bestfriend, he's my only family. I can't regard my family as family. I see them more as a friend or someone close that I know. I can't confide my feelings or problems in them. I was thinking of going to the school counselor but seeing the person ~ I think she could not help anything. I need a person more trustful than those I know.]
Teachers.....I can't credit them for teaching me a lot of things (except for some)...Because I don't think any of them did (at least to me-lah). Teachers are nothing but teaching robots that breathes like human & they can't feel. They have no feelings. An unfeeling thing - I HATE UNFEELING THINGS. Teachers only think of their own reputation.
Oh, well, not all of them are robots. Some 1 or 2 teacher(s) is/are human anyway. Like my teacher I can't forget in Primary School.
Teachers 'love' being flattered by suck-up students (which most of them ended up being teacher's pet). Their nostrils get bigger [LOL...I just translated the malay phrase-'Kembang Hidung' which means they become so flattered to the extent where they'll forget about themselves]...hearing the student's praises, sweet talks etc & these kind of teacher doesn't care a bit of those who can't speak sweet things..... I thought Miss Nirmaljeet Kaur was one of them, till the last day of school (yr 2000)... I was disappointed because I only got 4A & 1B for my UPSR exam. I think I failed everybody's hope. No teachers will turn their face to me again.
But my classroom teacher, Ms Nirmal gave me a present after 'Majlis Penyampaian Hadiah' (its the last day of school)....I was stunned...On top of the precious gift was a note written by herself:
To Ruth,
Strive for the best, you have the potential.
Remember my words, "Never Give Up".
Love, Teacher Nirmal.
2000
I was happy by then. She does care about me...
That is why I'm still standing straight till now, fighting for my destiny. I suffers a lot & I'm bound to change the fate of the children in the future. Less exam-oriented system, less stress, better life...
~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~@~
2003 PMR TOP SCORERS
(just sth I wrote about myself which was published in my school magazine)
I wrote:
"I did not expect to get 7A's for my PMR as my results for History & Science were not satisfactory throughout the year. I was shocked but excited when I recieved my results. The joy was also shared by my family especially my parents. Like what the principal had said before we sat for the exam, I had given them a very meaningful Christmas Gift.
I dislike memorising notes because I believe understanding could help me to remember better. During revision, when it comes to re-reading notes, I olny chose those that I did not fully understand so that I could save time for more revisions. Doing more practice helped me to remember certain notes.
I thank my parents for not forcing me to study because I hate being forced to do something. Our principal, Mr. Ng & all the teachers who taught us deserve credits for the motivation given before the exam. I personally want to thank my former Primary Six teacher, Miss Nirmaljeet Kaur for the trust & encouragement she gave me."
Side note:
-Despite what I said before about teachers, THE TEACHERS (when I'm in FORM 3) did gave me encouragement before the exam. I remember Miss Teh's words.
-They typed my favourite teacher's name wrongly!!! (I corrected it in this post)
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p/s: LOL.....Afdlin Shauki has his own blog!!! I just knew about it when I read Sunday's newspaper!
